Looking to the Past to Understand the Present

In Thai, the word "marriage" translates to thang naan laow. Directly translated it means "already dressed for work." The direct translation is indicative of the way marriage is viewed, as a duty, and the way my parents have always treated their relationship. Growing up, I never imagined getting married because my parents were so unhappy in theirs, but I have learned a lot from their mistakes, which is why we are happily married today. Plus, I get a cool mom and grandma now!

Anyway, I digress! While we were at my grandmother's, my aunt showed us this album of my parents wedding.


I never knew that my parents had a real wedding, so the whole album took me by surprise. Here is a selection I thought best represented what a traditional Thai wedding should look like....

Bride & groom wear traditional garlands and pose behind the wedding pedestal.
The wedding is in the bride's hometown, Cha Uat.

A string of flowers connects the bride & groom as older guests,
beginning with the grandparents then parents, pour water on their hands.
This is considered the most important part of the wedding ceremony.

Rings are exchanged.

Guests are thanked at the reception.

Whenever we've been out this past week, people have questioned whether or not both of my parents are Thai. I've had to explain multiple times that I am in fact not part white, even though I act like a farang and people keep on pointing to my nose as their evidence for my not being Thai. It is a detail that wears on me a bit because, despite their insanity, I am very proud of my parents.... You know, from afar.

I found the album very touching because it expresses a lot of things about the foundation of my parents' relationship that I'll never be able to discuss with them. Even though I hated going to visit my grandmother (you know, the trip that Logan has yet to write about), I'd like to think of this moment as the saving grace.

Don't they look classy?!